Confessions: Worry

You know when life seems to just be a crazy mess? Or maybe it’s organized chaos. Either way. Your standing in the middle. Waiting. Wondering where all these turns, highs and lows are bringing you. What is God working? This beautiful life I know He is so specifically orchestrating for us. Yet, in the middle, I just wonder what?  and why?? Can’t you just hurry up and get to the good part? Not that our lives aren’t wonderful! I just feel like I’m in the waiting period and I’m ready, SO ready, to get on with the rest of our adventure.

However, every day, I’m continuing to try, and really try,  to remember the journey is part of getting to the end.  Doesn’t it make the destination all worth it?

With the end of academy just around the corner, waiting for job offers, deployment orders in the not so distant future and another babies arrive before the end of the year, I feel like I am just waiting to get “There”. And it all seems messy in the mean time. Maybe it’s just seeing how far God has brought us. The doors really only He could have opened. The passion & abilities He has given my husband and making the opportunity available for him to follow that desire.  I see His hands orchestrating this beautiful, crazy life of ours.  Even the steps in between.

Sometimes, I’m much to busy with the worries of my day. Clothes to fold. Floors to sweep. And what the heck am I going to make for lunch for the little people, again? I mean, how do these boys eat, poop and dirty so many clothes!!!

But I need to stop! Stop worrying about tomorrow. Stop worrying about jobs. And deployments. Tonight, I’m not worrying about how, when and where, the if’s or whys…

“Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.” Matthew 6:34

 

And tomorrow when I fail, I know that God is still working and still can use my human-ness and my weakness. And I’m gonna work on loving these beautiful days with two busy, adorable, mischievous little boys! This is my story. Today is part of getting to where we want to be! It’s making me, molding me and continuing to shape me for the life He has planned for us.

 

“Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.” Romans 8:26-28

 

 

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