Confessions of a Not Crunchy Enough Mama

I saw a mom post a question on FaceBook about how to keep on top of everything and still be a good “Crunchy” mom.
I think Crunchy is a relative term… Some people see Crunchy as Birkenstocks, living in a hut, Breastfeeding a 5 year old, eating grape nuts all day long. None of these are bad mind you, it’s just not exactly my idea of “Crunchy”. Crunchy in 2000 meant something totally different then it does now I think too… When I think of Crunchy I think of cloth diapering Mama of 4, wearing 2 babies, baking bread, barefoot and pregnant. Wrong? Maybe… but that’s just the picture in my head =)

Back to the question at hand…How do you be an all out CRUNCHY MAMA? I’ll be the first to admit, there is a ton out there to do and ways to be green and crunchy. I can’t, and don’t want to do EVERYTHING on that list. There are things that are important to me, and I really try to stick to my *wish list* but sometimes it just doesn’t all happen. I’m not a super mama. I have a husband who is often gone and works late hours. I’ve been a single parent most of my parenting days, and I have 2 crazy little boys! I cut myself slack! I don’t ALWAYS bake bread from scratch. I don’t cloth diaper my two 24/7 {Shhh, don’t tell, but they wear disposables at night!}. Some days we have frozen taquitos from Trader Joes, or on “Guys Night”, Silas has Kraft Mac & Cheese.   Those things wont kill us. I let my boys play in the dirt and mud. I’m sure Silas has eaten a spider or two {maybe worse, who knows…}. My cloth diapers are often on the line to dry, I’ve been known to grab a coffee with Silas in the Ergo on my back while cradling a newborn Isaac in my arms. On the other hand, we have wood toys, but we have an array of Little People Zoo and Nativity figurines too. Do any of these things make me less crunchy? Probably… Sometime as a mama I look for validation from other mamas and women.  I have lots of friends who are crunchy. If someone told me they thought I was the most awesome “crunchy” mama, I’d be floored. Obviously, I’m not… and should I really be striving or want the praise of girl friends when really, the heart of the matter is doing what is best for YOUR own brood? It seems like so many of us are concerned about how other’s view our parenting and it is such a hot topic now a days.

This is my epiphany… I’m the BEST MAMA to MY little ones. Maybe I’m “CRUNCHY”, maybe I’m not quite Crunchy enough in the eyes of others. But  I’ve set my goals, my priorities, budget and time allowance. I’ll save some time, spend a little extra money, and buy the loaf of bread. That doesn’t make me less crunchy. And the kicker? GUILT, BE GONE. That Extra 43 min it would have taken up of my time to make some amazing 29grain, whole wheat, yad yad loaf is going to playing on the floor with my blue eyes wonder. Or singing a song with Silas while I help him learn letters. There is a time and place for everything. When my kids are grown and don’t need my help as much, I’ll make the best darn bread this side of Cambridge, Old Towne Orange has ever seen!
For now, I’ll stick to cloth diapering as much as I can. Meals will be made, but not always from scratch. The laundry will ever be rotating, dishes drying, laughter heard and learning in full swing. But most important on my list, that my boys know their mama loves them. That I’m not stressed out so much that I can’t enjoy these moments that are slipping between my fingers. I’ll never be perfect, but every day I want to enjoy my family and know that I did what was best for them! Most importantly, making my husband feel respected and loved. Not loosing our marriage in the chaos of life, little ones and deployments.

Maybe you’re struggling feeling like you aren’t the best {fill in the blank}… STOP. Have you told your husband you loved him? Have you kiss your kids? Have you talked with your Creator today?  Re-evaluate what’s most important to you! Forget what you think you SHOULD be doing! Do what you WANT to do! Don’t feel obligated to go crazy to keep up with the label.

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