feelings…

i’m not good at keeping a baby book (ok, it’s non existent…) so my blog is where i’ve been keeping “track” of things for silas. so bear with my thoughts…

it’s been a few days now since your dad headed back to Afghanistan. i think i’m getting a better grasp and handle on my feelings.

friday morning we went to the airport together and said good-bye to your dad. you cried a little as we walked away and were attached to me for the rest of the day. after trying to stay busy, we got home just in time for bed. i thought you would just fall right to sleep after being up at 3am and playing so hard! but when we got home you just crawled around the house and cried. you didn’t want mama hugs. i guess you had to see for yourself dad wasn’t here. i finally got you ready for bed and we went to read a book about daddy in bed. you were so sweet laying down, covering your eyes, popping up, like playing peek-aboo, but when daddy wasn’t there to make you laugh, you started crying again. thankfully, things have been getting better however.

the past few weeks have been very sweet memories. i know you probably wont remember those days, but i hope that that made an impression on your sweet little heart. from wake up smiles, to meal times, diaper changes, and grocery store runs, couch time and so much more, i loved every minute i got to see you interact with your daddy. your face lights up with smiles when you see people, but there sure was a special sparkle in your eye when you two were together.
this past year i have lived for the day the 2 most special guys in my life met. i finally got to see that day. baby silas, you will never know how much it meant to both your mama and daddy that you jumped right in with your daddy. it’s like you knew who he was, and i can only hope that that is true. these next few months may be hard. but i know that at the end of these short few months, we get to be together as a family again. getting to experience spending 2 weeks together was such a joy. you have no idea how excited i am to welcome your daddy home, and for us to become a family all under one roof! i know your dad is counting down the days until he is home and gets to hold you, to sing you “puff the magic dragon”, and swing you in your swing!

thank you silas for being the joy of my life. every day i wake up and am so excited to see your smile. when you wrinkle your nose, or do your eye brow tricks, you melt my heart. thank you for being such a blessing. thanks for keeping me company these long months. i love you!

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One thought on “feelings…

  1. I know this was a post for Silas, but I think this might just be the sweetest thing I have ever read!Goodness, I can't imagine the strength you have as a mommy with a newborn learning to raise and teach a son in such a way that Daddy, who although is temporarily away, is so very much a part of his life! I'm amazed by how you and your husband do it, and I truly respect and am in awe of you as a mother! I am praying for your little guy, and you and daddy for these next months as he's away!

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